As election results came in and a winner emerged, I received a number of requests from parents to comment on how to talk to children about the outcome. In particular, children who may have been disappointed with the results. Unable to sleep myself, I sat down around midnight to write some tips for parents.
For generations, babies were thought of as adorable, moldable lumps of clay that were there to be cared for and loved until they were old enough to be useful or interesting. Without language to tell us what they think or feel about the world around them, it can still be easy to disregard the amazing development that infants are undertaking in the first year of life.
This is one of those topics I never would have predicted the need for, but here we are. In cities across the country, adults seem to be dressing up as clowns and scaring children. There are reports of clowns roaming the streets holding fake weapons, dripping in fake blood, and threatening people. While this may sound straight out of an April Fools prank, it's no joke. There are schools and public officials around the country who have had to make official statements advising what to do if you see a scary clown and how to cope with the fallout from our current clown crisis.
It’s school shopping season and we want to make sure you have all the information you need to feel supported in your school search. Our last post featured an interview with college admissions counselor Heather Parry, helping us put college worries aside until high school. Today, Education Consultant Christy Haven, shares what parents need to be thinking about when searching for preschool through middle school options.
I can think of no better time of year to revisit the concept of “good enough” parenting! With summer upon us, I am struck again by the disconnect between the kind of parent I wish I were and the kind that I actually am. My mythical ideal parent has her kids with her all day the whole summer enjoying inventive and educational opportunities as we bask in each other’s company without the distractions of technology or sweet treats (in this version, my kids don’t even ask for these things because they are outside playing in the woods and reading fortifying literature). In reality, I am the kind of mom who adores her children and needs a break from them. I love having summer time adventures together and I love for them to have their own independent adventures and for me to have mine as well.
Back in 2005, author Ayelet Waldman proclaimed boldly that she loved her husband more than she loved her children in a New York Times article. This announcement seemed to strike a nerve, with quick reactions in the media that she must be an unfit mother and shouldn’t have had children to begin with. Waldman remained undeterred, however, and stated that the best foundation she could give her children was a strong partnership with their father. Whether you share Ms. Waldman’s feelings or not, she can be applauded for beginning a conversation and for shaking up our expectations of what kind of partnerships best serve both parents and children.
We approached the edge of the Grand Canyon slowly, eyes looking down at our feet and the ground immediately in front of us. When we got to the solid metal fence, we looked up and at once the grandeur and immensity of the canyon affected us. “Oh, my,” my six-year-old daughter called out. I glanced over at my nine-year-old son to see his mouth opened wide in wonder. My eyes filled with tears, not only at the beauty I was witnessing but at the real gift of sharing this moment with my children. This, I thought, is the reason we travel as a family. We are taken out of our everyday routine and get to have new experiences with those we love most in the world.
Check out the Spring Edition of Compass Positive Discipline Magazine. It's packed with 40 pages of tips from the top Positive Discipline writers and bloggers!
Wondering how to be a role model for your child? Surprise! You already are. All parents are the most significant role models our children will have in life. The choice is up to us as to what kind of role model we would like to be. They are always watching us, whether we are aware of it our not. They are storing away our responses as clues to how they should respond when in a similar situation.
For those of you who are regular readers of my blog, I'm sure you are aware brevity is not my forte. In fact, some of my posts are so long I’ve been asked if they are actually novels in disguise.
When it comes to communicating with children though, grownups often make the mistake of doing too much talking. In trying to get our point across, and be understood, we tend to go on in our rationalizing, lecturing, and explaining, hoping they will finally see our point and agree we are right.
Guilt may very well be a universal part of the human experience, and is often compounded and heightened after becoming a parent. Suddenly, you are entrusted with the absolute care of another human being, while continuing to balance all the other aspects of your life from before becoming a parent. It can feel impossible at times to succeed at all the varied roles you must take on during a given day—as a parent, a spouse or partner, child, sibling, friend, and co-worker.
What's your parenting style? Listen in as Sarina Natkin chats with Casey O'Roarty of Joyful Courage about the way we parent and how to shift your style. Click the image or link below to listen.
Joyful Courage Podcast #26: Exploring Parenting Styles With Sarina Behar Natkin
With Valentine's Day rapidly approaching, love is in the air! Like many little words with big meanings, love is one of those concepts we rarely take the time to discuss with our children. With all the "I love you's" children hear, they may wonder what makes someone love someone else, and if they love you have for them is the same as they love you have for a partner or friend. Considering the mixed messages many of us receive about the connection between love and sex, Sexual Health Educator Amy Lang, MA, seemed like just the person to talk to.
For more on this topic, check out: Building Cultural Identity In Children
An Ideal Parent?
A model of an ideal parent has developed in many of our minds that is based on extreme self-sacrifice and self-denial. This mother or father consistently buries his or her own needs in order to satisfy those of his or her children. This parent smiles cheerfully while anticipating every need her child expresses, while letting her own joy and pleasure in life go unexplored. I’m not sure where this model came from, but I think it’s time for each of us to ensure that we are not buying into it
For more on this topic, check out: Long-Term Parenting: Broaden Your Horizon
